Ringing the bells…

Another cold Omaha day yesterday. Brutally cold. The kind where the wind stings when it hits any exposed skin. I still don't know how some of our friends live out in this stuff. And lots of them are going into shelters this time of year. But there are still those that somehow manage to exist outdoors even in this weather. Don't know how.

Robin and I were invited to a Christmas party at the Open Door Mission Friday night. It was an honor to be invited and spend the evening with our friends. One of the highlights of the evening was a 40 minute video presentation done by Louie Giglio from Northpoint Church in Atlanta. It was the Indescribable presentation about comprehending the size of the universe and and even though we are stunningly tiny in the overall universal realm, God knows every star by name and also has the magnitude to know each and every one of us. It is an amazing look at His creation. Afterwards, we had opportunities to sit and chat with the "men". That's' how they're referred to at the shelter. The "men". I like to call them my friends. It's funny because I hear them called "the homeless", and all sorts of other collective types of names. And I suppose that's what they are. But we don't call ourselves "the homed". I have a pet peeve about labeling people so when I hear our friends referred to as "the men" or "the homeless", I try to make note not to do that myself. They are great folks who are maybe just going through difficult times. Maybe. So anyway, we had a chance to sit and chat with them. I happened to be a table host. Another label of course. So I chatted with a couple of fellows that I know, Harry and Bill. A sidenote here. Harry was given a camera recently by a social awareness type of group. The goal was to document the life of folks on the streets. The photos were auctioned off and money will go to the shelters. You can see some of the photos here - http://www.myspace.com/concreteconscience. So I sat with Harry and Bill and we prayed and talked. It was a great evening. I mostly talked with Bill.

You see, for some reason, I am extremely drawn to Bill. He was one of the first people we met on our journey in this community we've become immersed in. Met him in the Office that first weekend. You ever meet someone from a totally different walk of life and instantly hit it off with them? That was Bill for me. I mention Bill a lot in my ramblings. Couldn't really tell you exactly why, except I love the guy. How crazy is that? So, as we talked Friday night, I felt for Bill. He really, really want's to change his life. That much is extremely evident. But how? How does he get away from the influences that surround him daily and beat the addictions that rule his way of living. Only way I know is the Grace of God. He was a bit depressed Friday night. We hadn't seen each other since the previous Sunday. And then, Bill was feeling no pain. Zero pain. And we were supposed to meet Thursday for lunch. No show. That happens. He apologized for standing me up. I told him it wasn't a problem. I'd be there every Thursday, just as we're there every Sunday. If he shows, we'll chat, pray, and maybe work through a study program. If not, I'll give a sandwich to someone and be on my way. No worries. I mean, I was certainly disappointed that he didn't show, but that happens. So yesterday, he comes to our corner and he's in much better shape. Been sober for a week. Trying. I tried to hammer the point home Friday that if he ever needed someone to talk to to avoid the demon that haunts him, to call me. I'd meet him for coffee or whatever. He told me he had my number. I don't remember giving it to him, but he had it. Memorized. Told me I was his ace. I told him to keep me up his sleeve. And to call anytime. I'm not trained to help guys with addictions. I've had my own and God has been extremely graceful to me. I know what it's like to come out the other side and live with that seemingly for the rest of our lives. I know what that looks and feels like. I mentioned that to Bill yesterday. We've had 2 great conversations in the past few days. He want's out. I explained that for me, 17 years ago, I wanted out. When I mentioned 17 years, he perked up. He told me I had way too much to lose now. I agree. So does he. He's read through the entire New Testament over the last couple of months. He knows the deal now. Knows what it takes to make it eternally.

There was a memorial service Friday at the day shelter for all the "homeless" folks that passed on the previous year. They rang bells for each one of our friends that have gone before us. Lit candles and had a vigil service for them. As I talked to Bill on Sunday, he mentioned that he had to change. Otherwise, they'd be ringing a bell for him some day. And he doesn't want that. Told me so yesterday. Lord knows I don't want that for any of our friends. And I certainly don't want it for Bill. The thing is, after getting to know Bill a bit better over this past year, I sense a change coming over him. I certainly know that I can do nothing for Bill. Not in the physical sense. Of course I can pray for him. That I do. But he has to want out. Has to want to change. For the first time, I heard him say those words and I sensed that he meant it. He wants to live differently. Will he? I have no idea. I just know he wants it. That's one of the biggest obstacles. Recognizing the need to change. I'll keep on trying. All I can do is what I do. Pray. Meet with him. Pray some more. Be the ace up his sleeve. What else? Only God knows. I have mixed emotions. I have hope certainly. But there are so many Bills. And it pains me to know that bells will be ringing for them. 30 in the past year. That's maybe 30 too many. Doug died a couple of weeks ago. He was one of the 30. I pray that no bells will be ringing for Bill. There's still time for him. He gets it. But will he ultimately get it? Is it worth the effort to keep hoping? Oh I think so. The only bells I want to hear are the Salvation Army bells. Those I can deal with. These other bells? Lord help us to help them. "The men". "The homeless". The Bills. No bells for him. God bless ya Bill. I love ya man!

And to all those who help us help the Bills of our world…Merry Christmas!! And a blessed new year to you all! God bless you all for all the things you do to keep this ministry alive and thriving. Thank you doesn't seem to be enough. But thank you. You are an amazing group and Robin and I are so blessed to call you all friends and to serve in His name alongside of you all. Thank you for being faithful to the call to help those in need. Thank you and God bless you!!!

Peace and have a great and blessed week

..."it matters to that one"... :)