More ramblings...imagine that. :)

Soooo....you've been blessed with what you believe to be vision. In your eyes, there is no doubt that you are out there for the right reasons. You put it all out there because you know it's what God has for you. There is no doubt in your mind. Clearly, you are sanctioned by the love of God. No doubt in your mind whatsoever. Why then, would some feel the need to question that? Why? I understand people wanting to be helpful. I understand people caring for a persons well being. Caring for a person's eternal salvation. Or just simply caring. And I understand people maybe feeling the need to offer advice or opinions. I readily accept that. I welcome that. And I readily admit that I might sometimes be bull-headed. No mistake about that either. I wrestle with my demons and issues on a daily basis. Believe me, I come with plenty of baggage. Hey we all have our flaws...I get that.

What I don't understand is how something can be so unbelievably clear to me, yet maybe not so clear to others? I mean, how can something that is so incredibly powerful be doubted? We meet on the corner of 14th and Douglas here in downtown Omaha every Sunday at noon for fellowship with whoever shows up. It just so happens that most of those that do come down to meet with us are homeless or in some sort of transition. Whatever. They are no different than you or me. In some cases, they get it more than us. Maybe life is simpler for them. Maybe more complex. We all have our live issues to deal with. I don't begin to think I understand the complexities of what we are into here. I don't have any idea what God has in store for us. But I'm in for the long haul and the ride has been unbelievable so far. Robin and I have had discussions over the course of our doings and we have long term ideas. But for right here and now, it's all about showing up on Sunday with several pots of whatever incredible food that God has blessed us with for this particular day, maybe some physical needs items, and a whole lot of God's amazing love and grace. That's what it's all about for us right now. Nothing else. It is so incredibly simple. Yet so amazingly awesome. No agendas...no hidden messages. Just the awesome love of our Savior. We've been told that maybe we should deliver a message on Sundays. That blows my mind. And I say it blows me away because I'm pretty sure the message is out there. A wise friend recently reiterated a simple but profound saying...always preach the gospel, and when necessary use words. Don't get me wrong, I know the importance of God's word. Make no mistake about that. None. But I know that what happens for us on this very corner every week is of God. Every single event that takes place is about his mission. Every single cup of soup...every single slice of bread...every bottle of water...every single cup of coffee that I was able to serve yesterday with my beautiful 6 year old daughter...every blanket...every piece of clothing. All of it. Every thing we do is blessed and happens because He wants it to happen. There can be no mistake about that. It is so clear.

Yesterday, the weather finally broke for us. It was absolutely a great day. You have to understand that last week, we were digging out of a blizzard. Robin and I went to Charlotte for the weekend, so we actually missed out for the first time. Great timing on our part? :) I felt like something was missing and it was. We belong on that corner every single week. We had a great visit in NC with some very dear friends, but this is our corner. Our mission. One of the things that bothered me yesterday, even though it was a beautiful, almost spring day, was the fact that I couldn't get around to chat with all of "our" guys. I would guess that there were probably 80 - 100 people yesterday. Maybe that's an exaggeration. I don't know. There were a lot of folks on that corner.

One fellow in particular intrigued me yesterday...Menelik. I'm not always good with details, and when you meet so many guys on any given Sunday, the details sometimes seem to get mixed up. From what I recall, Menelik is native to Sudan. But he is from Ethiopia. Ironically, a very close friend of ours just returned from one of many trips to Ethiopia last week while we were visiting in Charlotte. Some outrageously cool stories from his trips. So it was very interesting to be able to chat with Menelik, if only for a few minutes. He is s very intriguing fellow. He was involved in some type of war in his homeland and saw his father murdered. Right before him. I can't imagine. As he told the story to Robin, he cried. I cry for him now. But something as simple as a meal on a Sunday afternoon in the park brought us together. He said he heard that we would be there. He came. We were there. Because God told us to go. What an awesome responsibility. But the coolest thing about it is that He supplies everything we need to go and, in doing so, allows us to minister to His people. To Menelik. I stood at the trunk of my car getting a bag of bagels together with Menelik. Something for later. He asked me to pray for him. I said yeah, but you have to pray for me. I need your prayer as much as you need mine. So Menelik is praying for me. Lord knows I need it. I am definitely in prayer for him. Lord knows he needs it. We all need it. Sometimes, I feel so hopelessly lost. But here's a guy who watched his father get killed right before his eyes. For what? And someone (again, didn't catch this part) paid his way to the US. And now he's homeless in the US? What is that all about? But because of his circumstances, and because we are so blessed to be there on Sundays, our paths have now crossed. He said he would be back next week. Maybe he will...maybe not. If I never see Menelik again, that's ok. I truly hope to see him again next Sunday. I have questions for him. He is a fascinating individual. No more than all the folks we meet. They all have a pretty unique story. Menelik's story is just a little different for obvious reasons. And he said he'd pray for me. Him praying for me. That is what it is all about. If I were to venture a guess, I would say that Menelik has a Muslim background? Maybe not. But he spoke of Jesus Christ. It was pretty apparent that he gets it. I can't wait to see him next Sunday. I have so many questions for him.

**** Edit from Mike Lilly (thanks Mike for filling in some of the blanks!) *****
Rock on!

Menelik was pretty interesting. An american living in England apparently paid for his trip over. He was sixteen when he joined the militia. They called them the Red Troops. They were all 15 and 16. He was lucky/blessed. When his unit got pushed across the border they came out at a UN border checkpoint that also had a camp. Apparently they were checked for health/disease and were on planes to Virginia within days. Many of his friends were not so lucky. They were the original "Lost Boys". There is more but that can be for later.

Did you know he was married here in the states (not sure what happended) and has a son and daughter. I think his son is in college if I understood him corrrectly.

**** End of Edit *****

And then there's Bob. I love Bob. He reminds me of a brother or uncle or simply a dear friend. He's not much older than me. Bob has a myspace page, so I really hope he doesn't mind me mentioning him here. I won't give away any secrets. I really don't know any. I just know that Bob has struggles not unlike me. Demons. Issues. I have 'em. Robin has 'em. We all have 'em. But there is a light that shines in Bob's eyes. I see it every time I talk to him. I felt cheated yesterday. I saw Bob early on getting something to eat and wanted to chat with him. I looked around a bit later and he was already gone. I felt a sinking feeling. Bob is one of the first guys we met. Talked to him in the "office" one afternoon. We mentioned that we wanted to spend the night in the shelter with him that day and he said he'd take care of us there. Show us the ropes. That is still in the plan. Did I mention that I truly love Bob? Well I do. It's really hard not to gravitate to certain individuals and Bob is one of the guys that I always feel a special kinship towards. Bob has a medical procedure scheduled for this Thursday morning. I'm pretty sure Bob wouldn't mind a few extra prayers. I'll be praying for him...

I guess I say all these things for a couple of reasons. Number one, there are so many stories. I could literally fill a book with the stories we've heard and been a part of over the last few months. I stood there yesterday and just took it all in at one point. I was talking with couple of guys that show up pretty regularly, Michael and Gene, and they mentioned how blessed they were that we did what we did. I told them "we" did nothing. It was all about His glory. We were just the guys and gals bringing the message. I really don't think they believed me when I told them how lucky and blessed "we" were. "We" being those of us who are so fortunate to be a small part of what God is doing on that corner. No walls. Open air, albeit, sometimes frigid air. But not yesterday. Not a few feet west of the office. The weather was perfect after a pretty cold winter. Our blessing of bringing the church to God's people is almost more than I can bear sometimes. And when we get to do it after enduring a fairly nasty dose of cold weather, it makes it that much more spectacular. I witnessed my kids running and playing among all the people. I saw Nick chatting with George almost the whole 2 hours we were there. I asked Nick later what they were talking about and he, like most nine years olds, couldn't remember. How many times have we asked our kids what they learned in school and tried to pry it out of them? Yesterday I tried to pry it out of poor Nick, but he's nine. It didn't matter how I asked the question. I tried leading questions, probing questions...nothing. But what Nick did say was so profound. He said George was his friend. I have no idea what George's story is? Maybe he has kids somewhere and this is his way of keeping them at hand. Maybe he just likes kids? Make no mistake that I sometimes fear for the safety of my kids. And it is difficult to keep an eye on them at all times. 2 hours on that corner is a lifetime to them. I say that I fear for their safety because I've been entrusted with their welfare. Not to mention the fact that I love them more than life itself. There's a lot happening on that corner on Sundays. In fact, it's pretty chaotic at times. But my kids absolutely love going down on Sundays. And they get to see the living version of Christ's mission for all of us. The other reason that these things are weighing pretty heavily on me lately is that I feel opposition. I guess anytime that God blesses us, the opposition will rise to try to tear it down. Well, it ain't happenin'. Not on our corner. Now on my watch. This is personal now. It's our baby. God clearly said to go and do. We are. We will continue. It is our mission. It's our kid. We've been entrusted with it's safety. These are our friends. We love going down there and we love what God is doing, not only on Sundays, but also in our personal situations. He is the reason we do what we do. It is not about us. It is about them. And more importantly...it is about Him. All praise and glory is His. And I so love Him with all my being. He has given me so much undeserved grace. On a personal level, I have let him down so many times. But every time I turn back to Him, there He is waiting with open arms. And every time we show up on that corner, He opens His arms a little wider to gather in His people. I love God.

One last thing. Yesterday, as everything winded down and things were packed away, I kind of just stood back and surveyed the area. It was around 2:00 p.m. DST. (Stupid daylight savings time...warning - small tangent coming - the missions neglected to tell some of the guys about daylight savings time...some of them arrived late and missed out on lunch. I never have liked DST and dislike it even more now...end of tangent!) So as I looked around at the wall-less "church" that just happens every Sunday, I did my usual eyeball survey for trash and whatever else needed to be picked up. And it never fails to dawn on me the magnitude of what happens there every single Sunday. I've heard we maybe need more vision or direction. I have no idea what that means. I don't know how anyone can actually show up there on a Sunday and see what happens and not know that God is directing it all. I'm not sure how we could direct it any better than He does?? It is clear that if we try to stay out of His way and let Him work through us, that His plan will be fulfilled. I am so honored and so thankful that He allows us to be a small part. His work is so great. His mission is so important. His vision is so apparent.

Oops..one more thing. Sundays are good. I love our mission. I love that Menelik is praying for me this week. Can you imagine? He is praying to our Christ for me!!! I love that I can chat with Bob on myspace. What an amazing world that we live in. What an amazing mission God has for us. What an absolutely unbelievable situation I find myself in every day. I love God and I so love the people He has placed in our paths. They so get it. They absolutely understand why we come. No agendas...no ulterior motives. Just the unmistakable and blatant love of our Savior. And we find ourselves in the most honored positions of bringing that love in whatever shape or form He so desires. We are so blessed...

Should I go on? Oh, I could... :) But I won't. If you've made it this far, your eyes are probably bleeding.

Peace and have a great and blessed week.

..."it matters to that one"... :)