Losing Control...

Well, it is finally happening. I feel as though "I" am losing control. Now, it could very well be that I never had control. In fact, I'm sure I never actually had control. What I mean is I now see this "thing" that started last year for us in downtown Omaha taking on a life of it's own. It never fails to amaze me how that happens. Just as a recap, November 12, 2006. That was our first Sunday. It started with Robin, myself and our kids going downtown two weeks before and sitting on a corner trying to figure out what the heck God wanted us to do. What? Go downtown and feed people? We can barely "feed" ourselves. How are we to "feed" others? Well, He told us to go. We did. A few of us loaded a pot of soup, some bottles of water and a very generous Panera Bread "dougnation" and headed out for what has grown to be our church. I know some people might take issue with us calling this our church. But that's exactly what it has become for us. Church. In the beginning, I wasn't sure what we were thinking. Maybe we weren't thinking. But we really had and frankly, have no idea where this thing is going to go. If you take issue with us calling this our church, please try to hear me out. I'm not theologically trained by any stretch of the imagination. In fact, for various reasons, I often feel rather inadequate when it comes to discussions that are biblically deep, if you know what I mean. I don't read my bible enough. My oldest son, Christian is involved in a bible-quizzing group at a local church here in Omaha. It amazes me how understands not only the scripture, but also the context. He gets it. That was just a little aside from a proud father. The thing is, I just don't spend enough time buried in His Word. I know I should, but I don't. Anyway, for reasons unknown to me, it just really seems that God has moved Robin and myself in a different direction, at least for the time being.

As I said, I know people will disagree with this thing we feel God has led us to do. That's certainly ok with me, I mean, we all disagree with one another on matters like this all the time. I don't know that it means one way is right and the other is wrong. I guess one day we'll all find out? But this missional, incarnational type of church, for us, right now, in this time and place is how we see Him using us. What this means to us is that instead of attending a traditional, attractional church, we are attempting to take the church to His people. Into the cracks and crevices where He leads us. I can see where a person might say "well yeah, but you need to be in church". I totally see that. The hardest thing for me has always been the extraction from the traditional thinking. Taking myself out of the box. Out of the forward facing pews and out into the world. The transformation for me has been at times, both a long, slow journey and a radical shift in my thinking. A very close friend of ours recommended a book to us called "The Shaping of Things to Come". It speaks to a lot of these things. A lot of these issues. I haven't read it yet. I will. I've skimmed some of it and read a couple of online reviews. It's next on my list. But the crazy thing about this and a lot of these types of books - they nail down where Robin and I are at right now. Almost as if I could have written the thing myself. Now, I haven't read it. I'm not a big reader. Unless it's the sports page or a Cornhusker message board forum where I can escape from the craziness of life for a few minutes. I've just never been a big reader. Call it procrastination, attention deficit disorder, whatever. So, when I do pick up a book like this and it resonates with me exactly the things we are going through, it has to be from God. Has to be. Has to.

Here's the thing for me. I'm not saying for one minute that we'll never be in any kind of traditional or non-traditional church again. We attended a church (or un-church) in Charlotte that was one of the best experiences of my life. I mean, I learned more in the short time there than in most of my other experiences combined. But it's all part of the journey. I don't think I could take one piece of my church experience out and have a complete puzzle. Does that make sense? I mean, all the places we've been all the churches we've attended, they all complete the experience to this point. This, for us, is simply the next step. What we've seen in the 5 or 6 months that we've been at this only confirms that we are where we're supposed to be. I think the understanding that I've come to is that there is a place for our type of worship, just as there is a place for traditional worship. In the attractional setting of the traditional church, and this is just my opinion, the person seeking answers might be uncomfortable. Again, in the big picture, this shouldn't be about our comfort level. But lets face it, if people are uncomfortable sitting in a pew, they aren't coming back. At least in some cases. So why not offer another setting? A really radical and untraditional setting? Why not? Jesus didn't say, sit in your church and wait for people to come to you. I mean, it works in lots of instances for people to show up at a church, be invited by a friend or however one makes it in the front door. That definitely works. I've seen it far too many times. But there are a whole lot of people out there who are lost and that approach may not ever work. Ever. That's an awfully long time. So how do we reach them? Maybe take the church to them?

Here's a great analogy, stolen straight from the book. I'll plagiarize a little here, because I'm not being graded. The only citation I'll give is read the book. I don't think God will mind. Here goes. The traditional church asks people to come and hear the gospel in the holy confines of the church and its community. This seems so natural to us after seventeen centuries of Christendom, but at what price and to what avail have we allowed it to continue? If our actions imply that God is only really present in official church activities - worship, Bible studies, Christian youth meetings, men's and ladies fellowships - then it follows that mission and evangelism simply involve inviting people to church related meetings. Here's another one - If you are digging a hole in one place and realize that you need to dig it elsewhere, you don't get there by digging in the same place only deeper. And yet, sometimes, churches when they realize the old attractional mode isn't working, seem to believe that if they just do attractional church better, it will work. ??? Just some things to think about...

So then, lets look at it like this. A fence is "a bounded set," something that determines who is in and who is out. But a well is centered. For example, fencing the vastness that is the Australian outback simply isn't possible. Instead, a farmer sinks a well to create a precious supply of water. It is assumed that livestock will stray, but never wander too far from the well. Therefore, when we sunk our "well" on 14th and Douglas, we centered ourselves in a crack or crevice that we knew to be un-fenced. We knew that if we showed up consistently at noon every single Sunday, we'd have a crowd waiting for us to share Christ's love. In every action. In every deed. With every draw from the provisional well, we could share, in this open expanse, that we are all in this thing together. So we might as well do something worthy of His cause.

I recently finished a book called "Same Kind of Different as Me". Now again, I'm not a big reader, but this book had me from the start. Thanks to Mendy for recommending it to us. What an awesome story. It's about a fellow who starts out as a modern day slave in Louisiana and becomes homeless in Fort Worth, Texas. At the same time, a couple in that city is on a journey, much like Robin and I, to find a higher meaning. Their paths cross and the book tells their stories. One of the points of the book - we're all different, be it because of life circumstances or whatever, but we are no different. In fact, we're all the same kind of different.
Rambling... :)

So, yesterday, I felt as if I was losing control. But not really. What I mean is this. Robin was out of town, roughing it on a Carolina beach somewhere. Rough duty. She deserves it. So we had a group of folks who wanted to do the meal yesterday as a small group service project. His timing is amazing. So no cooking in our house yesterday. You see, the well is sunk in downtown Omaha. Doesn't matter who cooks. Doesn't matter who goes down. What matters is that people get involved in the bigger mission. The missional church. Look, we send people to foreign countries to do missional work. And we need to. We have to. But we also need to send people into the inner cities and the other less desirable places right in our own backyard. It takes all these things to make it work. To reach the less fortunate. To be the hands and feet. I had a guy call me reverend yesterday. Reggie. I was passing our some of the many provisions we are blessed with on a weekly basis. Reggie was simply asking for one of the hygiene items that were in abundant supply in the van. I had to stop him and tell him I'm nobody. In the grand scheme of things? Nobody. And definitely not a Reverend. No way, no how. Just plain old me. But his perception was different. Why? Because I say prayer before we eat on Sundays? Because, whenever someone thanks me for whatever, I tell them not to thank me, thank Him? Why? Who knows? I've never once represented myself in that manner. So I have no idea why he would think that. Just seemed odd to me. Because in the big picture, I'm nobody. Different maybe, but nobody. Just one who felt the need to do something a little different? And some wonder why we chose Sundays at noon? I couldn't really tell you that either. I guess because it's lunchtime and people are hungry? Seemed like a good time and place to sink a well? I simply give thanks to God for blessing us with this ministry. We have been blessed beyond our wildest imaginations.

Back to the control issues for a minute...not for one minute do I think I'm in control. I mean, we have to do the work. The dirty work. So someone or a couple of someones have to take somewhat of a leadership role. But we all know who the true Leader is. Make no mistake about that. The funny thing for us now is that we have so many new people jumping on board, it's really hard to keep track of all the names. And maybe thats ok. Maybe we should all be nameless and faceless. Helping those that, lots of times, are themselves nameless and faceless...hmmm.

Anyway, just some random thoughts on things that are happening for us. I just like to try to capture some of the things that are happening for us and why we do some of the things we do. Missional vs. attractional? Fences vs. wells? I just hope if we are digging holes we are able to get out of them. The one thing to remember...if you find yourself with a shovel in hand and the dirt keeps falling back on your head? Stop digging... :)

Peace and have a great and blessed week.

..."it matters to that one"... :)