6 Beers and a Task Force

I had the chance to talk with and pray with a fellow today and it just broke my heart. He’s a fellow that we’ve known since almost the beginning of this thing we do downtown each week. When I first saw him today, it was obvious he’d been drinking. Now it was noon when I first saw him. Seriously? Drinking before noon on Sunday? Told me he had 6 beers this morning. Well, yeah. It’s how it works for lots of these guys. If I back up a bit, I really have felt the need lately to be a bit more intentional about lots of things. Especially as it relates to things on that corner and just brushing off some of the things I see each week. Laughing and joking about a guy drinking before noon is not something I want to have happen. Sometimes it’s easier to just laugh it off rather than confront it, even gently. Or any other way. So today when I saw our friend, I just took it a step further and asked him to at least not drink before noon. What a ridiculous request. From his perspective anyway. But it was a request. For next week anyway. At least. I have no idea how hard that will be for him. Or if it is even possible for him. We had an opportunity to pray briefly. Just me and him by the side of the van with traffic buzzing by us. I wonder sometimes what people think when they drive by and see this crazy thing happening each Sunday. And today was most probably the biggest crowd I’ve seen on that corner. Just seems to grow weekly. I pray that somehow we can sustain it. That God would send us cooks. Because if today was any indication, we’ll need all the help we can get. So after we finished our prayer by the side of the van we both looked up and in his eyes were tears. Hurt. We just see it so much. A guy wants to quit and get away from it, but the alcohol has it’s hook in. Deeply. Wickedly. I see so much hurt and so much despair caused almost exclusively by choices. Of alcohol. Of substance abuse of varying kinds. It all seems so avoidable. Seems like such an easy choice. But it isn’t. That’s for sure. I saw it in his eyes. Through the tears. "That stupid alcohol". His words. He told me he wouldn’t drink before noon next Sunday. I guess we’ll see.
　
I have to mention a couple here today that have been so instrumental in this thing lately. Amazing family. It’s so cool to see how God works in a ministry like this. After almost three years, we’ve seen lots of people come and go. It’s a big commitment. We know that for sure. People jump in with both feet and go at it for a while. Then the burn out thing kicks in or they just get tired. Like I said it’s a big commitment. For sure. But when people or families jump in and take ownership, it just makes me smile and thank God for his unbelievable faithfulness. All he asks is that we go. He’ll supply everything we need to keep it going. We just have to be willing to go. And today this couple went above and beyond. If I’m being honest, God will smile on them for sure. But it’s what we’re called to do. To help those who need it the most. To love and care for those who maybe might not see it otherwise. I don’t know. I just know this family shined today. Not unlike most Sundays. I saw my own wife working her tail off this morning to make a quality meal for our friends. And they pulled it off. Beef and chicken enchiladas, corn, rice. Man it was a good looking meal. And lots of it. And the people that commit to making it happen week after week are a blessing to so many. I know we served at least 250 meals today. We ran out of forks, spoons, everything. Had to make a run for more. Unbelievable. Yet God continues to fill in the gaps. With great people. And His unbelievable Grace and Love. Amazing.
　
And then there was the task force. We have an ongoing situation down there involving a young fellow who is an alleged sex offender. Now I have to admit, I’ve searched various websites looking for confirmation and have found nothing. He once told me the story of what actually happened. Now I only got his side of the story. But something definitely happened. And everyone down there knows. And everyone is an authority. And each week it seems like someone wants to take me aside and "break the news" to me. As if it doesn’t happen every week. I think people just want to be safe, but a part of it is surely that people want to be the one to break the news. Whatever. Look, I bring my own kids down there, so I try my best to know who we are dealing with. But there just isn’t any way. It’s a wide open corner. Anyone can come and anyone can go. If evil insists on joining us on that corner, I just pray that God’s presence will be enough to offset the ridiculous evil that lives in this crazy world. So one of the fellows has organized a task force. I chuckle when I think of it, because he literally has a handful of people "stationed" at various points looking out for this fellow. The task force! And today he gave me the lowdown on what his guys are looking for. They are attempting to establish hard evidence against this fellow. Man, if I only had the energy. Anyway, it’s just another angle into this thing. We now have a task force. Personally, I think we’re covered by the real Task Force anyway, so I don’t worry too much. And it's so funny, because if the people that took me aside each week would just stop and think about how ugly we all are before God in so many of our actions and words, it might just cause some people to stop and think. Maybe not...
　
Anyway, just a few things on my mind this week. It was an interesting week for sure. A cleansing week. :) Lots of interesting conversations today on that corner. I felt a bit of renewal for some reason. Just feels good to be on that corner, in God’s presence. What a bizarre community we’ve landed in. In such a good way. I can’t believe we’d have it any other way. I love it. It’s a little much to manage anymore, but that’s ok. Like I said, we just have to show up and watch the Lord work. What a cool thing to be able to say. What an even cooler thing to be able to do.
　
And this world is fading away...But anyone who does what pleases God will live forever. ~ 1 John 2:17, NLT
　
Peace, have a great and blessed week and make a difference.
　
…it matters to that one… :)

A Memorial Day Mind Dump

Monday. Memorial Day. So many things bouncing around in my feeble mind. Used to be that I would journal my thoughts on Monday morning on a pretty regular basis. But then Monday morning would roll around and I’d have already forgotten anything of significance that happened on the previous day. Amazing what a little age can do to the mind! So I started doing this thing on Sundays, almost immediately after coming home from downtown. I got a little lazy yesterday and decided to see what might come up in my recall abilities if I threw this together this morning. We had a busy few days leading up to Sunday. Our host student is leaving us soon. Back home to Germany. I pray that her time here has been good. She’s been here since January and leaves the first Friday in June. We spent the day at an amusement park on Thursday, went to Lincoln to tour the university and state capitol on Friday and did some yard work on Saturday. So we had a little downtime yesterday after coming in from downtown and we all took advantage of it. No half marathons this week. Just a little downtime after downtown.
　
It was a pretty nice day downtown yesterday. Nothing unusual happened. Not from my perspective anyway. Pretty calm crowd. A couple of crazies, but that's pretty normal. Numbers seemingly growing each week. We were visited by a home group from a church in our community. I believe they are looking for an opportunity to serve in some manner in the community and they heard about what we do downtown and came along for the ride. I always wonder what people think when they come down for the first time. This group of four came to our house and then headed downtown with us and jumped right in. Helping with the setup, serving, all the things that go along with this ministry. It’ll be and always is interesting to hear their thoughts. At one point, I was getting a to-go plate for a friend. The serving size on the plate was pretty heaping. Nice portion. So as I was making my way through the back of the serving line, one of the people from the group asked me if the serving sizes weren’t a bit too big. Now I usually try to keep my nose out of that arena. Usually, whoever is doing the serving has a pretty good handle on what we have. But this person was down for the first time. And she mentioned to me that the line was pretty long and they were sure giving out lots of food! Would we have enough? And I had to look at the amount and agree with her on both counts. The line was long and they were definitely giving out large portions. But I was pretty sure we had plenty. And I was able to tell her. It was just slightly humorous to see the concern. Because I learned long ago that if we go, God will definitely take care of the rest. Loaves and fishes, I always tell myself. Loaves and fishes. And when I mentioned that to her, she smiled and agreed. I think. :)
　
Definitely keeping it short this week. I’m reminded this week of our veterans. Those that made it back and those that didn’t. Lots of homeless veterans. I served a couple of years in our fine military. I think it goes without saying that when we serve, we feel a sense of camaraderie. No doubt. No matter how much time separates me from my time in the service, I feel it. And I’m obviously reminded of the sacrifice that our troops make for us. Lives lost. The ultimate sacrifice. Families separated. Difficult times for sure. And of course I’m reminded of THE ultimate sacrifice. That God would send His one and only Son to die for us while we were still sinners. Man. Talk about the Ultimate Sacrifice.
　
Look! I stand at the door and knock. If you hear my voice and open the door, I will come in, and we will share a meal together as friends. ~ Revelation 3:20, NLT
　
Peace, have a great and blessed week and make a difference.
　
…it matters to that one… :)

Southern Winds

Lots of really, really good things come out of the south. Lots. Excellent food. Excellent people. Really good, down home people that would give you the shirt off their back in lots of cases. Just lots of goodness. There’s a particular church that I’m especially fond of that just happens to reside in the south. Great, great church that is doing amazing things for the kingdom. Starts with the pastor (or reverend as my kids like to call him), his family and absolutely trickles down to the folks that call that church home. I spent the first 12 years of my life in the south. Spent 5 of probably the most important years of my life fairly recently down south. Florida. North Carolina. Great times and great memories. Probably love to go back someday. But today? We’re here and full in. Yesterday was unseasonably cool here. Winds straight out of the north. Cold winds. Had to sit through an early morning soccer game. Just crazy cold winds for this time of year. But not today. Today the winds were out of the south and they couldn’t have been nicer. I mean, it was a little cool, but not nearly as bad as yesterday. So where am I going with this? And what is the significance of the weather report? Well it is very significant. At least it was to me. Especially from about 9:50 CST this morning until approximately 11:30 or so. I was inspired not long ago to run a half marathon. The inspiration just happens to have been the above mentioned reverend. So wind speed is pretty important when considering the day and time to run. For me anyway. Nothing worse than running headlong into a cold north wind on a run. Headlong into any wind for that matter. But the cold north wind? Forget it man. Not happening. So since I was inspired by a great friend from Charlotte to do this thing, I had to just buckle down and make it happen. Today.

I’d been semi-planning for some time now. Trying to get my road legs built up. I run on a treadmill often. Most everyday. But running on a treadmill is not the way to train for a half marathon. Conditioning is fine, but the old legs take a beating on the roads, so it’s a different ballgame. So this was going to be the day. I was a bit worried yesterday with the winds. But the forecast today was for partly cloudy and winds at 10-15 mph out of the south. Since the majority of my run was in a northerly direction, things seemed to be set up pretty nicely. So I could bore people with even more details of the actual run, but I won’t. I will say that it was pretty interesting in many ways. Very metaphorical at times. Struggling to get up some of the steeper hills (yes we do have hills in Nebraska…not many, but they seem to be longer and steeper on a long run). Coasting down the other side. Long straight-aways. All things that resemble so many of life’s challenges and pitfalls, as well as the victories. Had lots of cranking music bouncing around the old noggin and did lots of praying. As much as you can in between gasping breaths!

So I planned on getting downtown just before Robin and the other folks who were coming to help. But the winds pushed me in a half hour early. Nice tailwind! I couldn’t believe it. The guys downtown thought I was crazy. They might be on to something. I very well could be. But it’s something I wanted to do. A bucket list sort of thing maybe. Lots of jokes about how they make medications for runners. They have things called cars with wheels that would have gotten me downtown much quicker and with much less exertion. Stuff like that. All good natured. It was funny, because my adrenaline was sky high when I arrived. And I was a full half hour early. So it gave me time to just chat with people in a much more relaxed environment. No set up. No making sure everybody was taken care of. Just a relaxed time for hanging out. And when I got there at 11:30, there was already a huge crowd lining up. Just an amazing opportunity to hang out and share a little with whoever. And I got so many chances to be so intentional about faith things today. It was so cool. I have to admit, by the time we were loading up the trailer, I was fading fast. But it was so worth it. And last week when I was doing a partial training run, an idea popped into my head. A marathon to benefit our friends. Or in my case, a half marathon. The Half for the Homeless. Or something like that. A run that could traverse 2 counties, involve lots of people and raise lots of awareness. And our friends could be the recipients of whatever came of it. I have high hopes that it could be a real blessing. As long as He wants it to happen. As I ran this morning, I had lots of thoughts around this idea. I pray it was God’s idea and He just pushed it off on me. Obviously, if it’s in the Plan, it’ll happen. I pray it’s in the Plan. :)

So in all of it, I’m reminded of one of my favorite verses.

Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. ~1 Corinthians 9:24

Now obviously, "all the runners" this morning consisted of me. So I did in fact get the prize. And I did in fact have those great winds out of the south at my back. But the runners in this thing we do each week are all running with great abandon. So many people from so many backrounds. And I’m so blessed to be a small part of it. I simply want to cross the real finish line in such a way as to earn the real prize. Not matter if I’m bloodied and bruised along the way. In fact, I hope that does happen. Because my hope is that I never just go through the motions. That as I meet each week with our friends that there is a genuine desire to be there. A genuine desire for change. A genuine desire for southern winds at my back and an eye on the prize.

Peace, have a great and blessed week and make a difference.

…it matters to that one… :)

Mother's Day...

Today is Mother’s Day. Now some may call this a Hallmark holiday. I’ve been guilty of it on occasion. But it really is a day to honor the Mothers in our lives. What an amazing sacrifice they make. Not to get too personal here, but in my case, there are a couple of ladies who’ve gone above and beyond the call of duty. Robin and my Mom, Gerdo. I’ve been blessed so far beyond anything I deserve in this life. God has pulled me from the grip so many times. And each time a certain someone is standing there, waiting to pick up the pieces. Mom did it more times than I could count. Now one could say that’s part of the job description. But in my case, especially with my Mom, well, she was far underpaid if that was part of the job description! I literally owe her my life. Ironically enough, a random reading in my morning devotional this morning was centered on the prodigal son. Luke 15:11-32. Mom, like Someone else, is always there. Arms open. Waiting for us to return. What an amazing testimony. And of course, I’ve been blessed with an amazing woman to do this whole life thing with. Robin is one of the most amazing people I know. I’m biased, of course, but it’s true. She’ll hate that I’m writing this, but isn’t it always easier to ask for forgiveness? :) To navigate through our life the way she has, with the pitfalls and craziness that I’ve put her through? Amazing. Homeschooling. Ministry work. Compassion. Amazing. Between her and Mom, I don’t know how one guy could be so blessed. I wonder how many of our friends downtown today got the opportunity to spend a little time with Mom today? If I had to guess, I’d say not so many…

Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: "Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all." ~ Proverbs 31:28-29

Ironically enough, on this day that we celebrate Moms all over, I’m also reminded that one year ago today my Father left us. Again, not to get too personal here, but it’s been a strange week for me. My Dad and I had grown much closer over the years. We didn’t have much of a relationship for a very long time. Wasted lots of years. Lots. But in the end, there wasn’t much we could do about the wasted time. And I’d like to think we made up for it. At least partially. I know that like most people, we have a few situations in our life now that need attention. I pray that God will guide us and direct us in how exactly to deal with some of those situations. I know in His time, He will. I just know that I’m so thankful for the time my Dad and I did share before his passing. We were able to spend a few weekends together. We attended an Auburn football game together. What an amazing weekend. I drove over from our home in Charlotte. We spent an entire day walking around the Auburn campus. Reminiscing. Enjoyed a bit of our mutual favorite pastime. College football. But it was then I realized how much older and how sick my Dad really was. It literally took him a week to recover from that trip. I had no idea it would be that tough on him. But he loved every minute of it. As did I. So on this day, this day that we celebrate the women in our lives, I have to carve out a little bit if time to remember my Dad. It wasn’t a let’s go to a ballgame/fishing/hunting kind of relationship growing up, but in the end, we made it work and I’m so thankful that we did that before he left us. I think lots of times, at least I know in my case, all I really ever wanted from Dad was to hear that he was proud of the man I’d become. I have so much to learn. I’ve made and continue to make so many mistakes. But before he left, he told me on several occasions that he was indeed proud. If only I could hear those words from him again. If only I could hear them from Him also. I wonder how many of our friends downtown long to hear those words? Probably lots of ‘em.

Gonna keep this a bit short today. Or maybe not. Downtown was a bit of a rush, but I do want to share one thing that happened. Our foreign exchange student participated in the high school graduation ceremony, so our time downtown was short. Others picked up the slack. But in the short time that I was there, I met a fellow. His name isn’t as important as was the question he asked me. He simply asked if Christ would continue to forgive a fellow who was caught up in an addiction that has haunted him all his life. Would Christ forgive a fellow believer who couldn’t quite beat his demons? He said he could stay sober for 6 or 7 months at a time, but then he’d fall and need help up again. Now for me, I struggle sometimes when guys ask me questions like this. I have no idea why. Maybe because sometimes I just don’t know. In this case? I know. He does. Every time. That has to be the answer, right? I mean, I didn’t read that little bit of wisdom this morning for no reason. He’s always there with open arms each time we turn back to Him. I tried so hard to let this fellow know that. So I had an opportunity to pray with him right then and there. I love doing that. I used to be a bit uncomfortable praying with people in public. I don’t know why. But it comes easier each time I do it. And today it was real.

We are so thankful that God has blessed His ministry work on that corner in such a way. He is so amazing! I’m so thankful that He placed this craziness in our laps. I’m so thankful that I can pray for more help and it comes! What an amazing testimony to His faithfulness. Thanks God for all you do and for your unbelievable Love. Thanks for Moms everywhere that shape lives and do so the way You’d have it happen. Thanks.

Happy Mother’s Day! (Mom and Robin!)

Peace, have a great and blessed week and make a difference.

…it matters to that one… :)

Dichotomies

So today was an extremely strange day. I began my morning listening to a podcast from our church in Charlotte called REJESUS. A fascinating look at the Wild Messiah. So today I just listened to the introductory podcast. I downloaded the remainder of those that are available. I highly recommend this podcast series (ucfellowship.org). I’m sure it’s an amazing group of messages that will challenge anyone listening to really look into themselves and see what it really is they believe and maybe even why. So that was my morning in the garage getting ready to go to see our friends downtown. My Sunday mornings are getting a bit lighter. That’s one of the nice things about spring/summer. The needs, the physical ones at least are a bit lighter. No heavy winter coats. No gloves. Sneakers replace winter boots. It just seems the trailer is lighter. The other side of that is the amount of people in need. I swear today was one of the bigger crowds we’ve seen in a while. One way I can judge the number, because I’m not too good at looking at a crowd and guessing, is the number of handshakes and hugs. I always try to make my way through the line and greet our friends as best I can. The line today stretched almost an entire city block. I’m guessing at some point I’ll be shaking hands and getting hugs in the crosswalk! Or at least around the other side of the block. So the winter needs have lightened, only to be replaced by the sheer amount of people in need. I don’t know if that makes sense or not, but I'm sure there’s a point here somewhere.

Which leads me to my next thought. This weekend in Omaha, the Oracle of Omaha himself, Warren Buffet, held his annual shareholders gathering. A mere 4 or 5 blocks from where we meet with some of the neediest people in Omaha, some of the wealthiest people in the world were cheerleading and carrying on about their good fortune. Approximately 35,000 people attend this thing annually. I suppose in some circles, they might have been voicing concerns about the fact that a single share of Berkshire Hathaway stock is "only" worth about $93000.00. That’s down considerably from it’s September 2008 high of $147000.00. PER SHARE!!! That’s just freaky. So a few blocks from our corner, some of the wealthiest people in the world were probably lamenting their misfortune. Unbeknownst to them, there were a few hundred people on a downtown street corner who were trying to figure out which bridge they might be sleeping under tonight. And asking us for tents. And sleeping bags. And these requests weren't for some vacation camping adventure. What irony. What an unbelievable dichotomy. What a shame. I’m not for one minute saying that throwing money at homelessness would solve the problem. Not at all. It’s much deeper than that for sure. But it was just odd to me as we left the downtown area today, as I looked at the Qwest Center, where the meetings were taking place, that there was such a divide between the two factions.

Today, the great folks at St. James were back with enough lasagna to choke a herd of horses. I mean, the line was long. I sometimes wonder if we’ll have enough. Not to be a doubter. I just wonder. And every time I looked at the stack of pans near the table, I wondered. And of course, we had just enough. Just like always We always have enough. I had an interesting conversation with a fellow about that situation. You see, Robin and I usually never eat downtown. I would feel pretty badly if I had a plate of food and someone showed up who hadn’t eaten. I would feel really badly actually. I can go home and grab a bite to eat. There folks have to figure out where the next meal is coming from. I once heard a guy say that if a fellow got hungry in this town, he wasn’t trying very hard. I understand that. But I struggle with taking something and then not having enough. His point was that we should at least have a small bite to eat with our friends. I know he’s right. I just have a hard time with it. One of his arguments was that we should show everyone that the food is good enough for us also. I know that much. The food is always excellent. Robin wouldn’t have it any other way. It has to be the best. So us not eating may send the wrong message in various ways. I just feel we’re there to serve. Him. And in the process, lots of folks get blessed in lots of ways. Not the least of which is us. I mean, we must have passed out 300 bottles of water today. That’s probably more than we’ve ever handed out. In fact I know it is. And we had lemonade and coffee on top of that. Just a massive amount of people showed up today. And not a penny from Warren Buffet. :) All from God. No doubt.

And the weather was absolutely stunning today. Barely a breeze and about 70 degrees. Chamber of Commerce weather for sure. Almost had a little dustup. And yours truly was right in the middle of it. It’s funny how alcohol adds strength to a fellow who otherwise might not be so bold. Today, in both individual cases, these fellows weren’t feeling much pain. And in reality, neither one of them probably could have landed a square punch. But I certainly didn’t want to find out. In the end, I know that eventually something will shake out. We’d never had rain until last week. So far, we've never had a fight. Someday, a scuffle will break out. With the number of people we see each week and the outside "influences", I’m not naïve enough to think it won’t happen. I hope and pray it doesn’t. I don’t want to see it. I was almost in the middle of it today. Would have seen it up close and personal. But cooler heads prevailed. Or something.

So another great day in downtown Omaha. It seems odd saying that a few hundred people in need constitutes a great day. It doesn’t. But when God provides for some of the needs of these folks, well that does indeed meet the criteria for me. I had one girl tell me that if we didn’t show up each week, she didn’t know what she’d do. Not sure what that means really, and I guess I don’t need to know. I do know that God continues to blow me away. Each and every week. He just sets such a great scene for us down there to show people what He can do if they only allow Him to use them in meaningful ways. It’s just amazing.

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. ~Jeremiah 29:11

Peace, have a great and blessed week and make a difference.

…it matters to that one… :)

Gone...

Tough week. Started with a funeral on Monday. An infant funeral. I’m pretty sue that was a first for me. I hope it’s a last. I don’t think I’ve seen anything more heartbreaking and gut wrenching than a father carrying his infant daughter’s casket. And he was pretty strong about it. I know for a fact I would have been a basket case. We met this family sometime previous to the Christmas of 2007. I know this because we’ve been blessed to help them the past two Christmases. They have 3 other young children. When we met them, they were homeless. Now? They have an apartment and they are struggling, but doing better. But this was definitely a bit of a setback. That seems so trivial to say the death of an infant daughter was a setback. I don’t know what else to call it. It was so difficult for me. I can’t imagine what it was like for them. Baby Pearl was born prematurely and was just not strong enough to make it on her own. There were complications. The parents had to make the extremely difficult decision of removing the life support. I don’t know how you make that decision. I just don’t know. She was a beautiful little girl. She is a beautiful little girl. She’s with our Father now. That much I know. But it was probably the most difficult parting service I’ve ever witnessed. At least for someone that wasn’t a part of my immediate family. This family though, has been through so much. And now this? Some things just don’t make sense to me.

And then when I got home from work Monday afternoon, we received a letter stating that a friend whom we’d been trying to help with a cataract surgery had been denied an opportunity to receive a free surgery to remove or repair his cataracts. Whatever it is they do. The thing is, they reviewed 60 or so candidates. Of those, they chose 23. We were convinced he’d be one of the 23. And so, I get home from work that day, see the letter and the hope I experience as I open the letter is overwhelming. You see, throughout this whole process, he has proclaimed to Robin and I that he is counting on us. Flaw number one. Never count on your fellow man. I mean hope that things will come out the way you’d like, but never count on it or we might be setting ourselves up for disappointment, right? I tried to explain that to him many times. So when I open the letter and find out that he has been rejected, I of course was pretty bummed. We wanted so badly for him to get this done. Well, as God would have it, He gave us a backup plan. Actually, it was probably His main plan. A family who has helped in many ways, was deciding what to do with a particular amount of money. It was the young son who had this fellow on his mind and heart. And as God would have it, this young boy really wanted to help in this situation. Now he didn’t even know that this fellow was rejected by the eye clinic. He just wanted to help. So they asked if they could help in this particular situation. Are you kidding me? Seriously? Yeah. Absolutely. So stay tuned for this one…more to come here for sure.

Sadly, we lost another friend this past week. This is the local news blurb:

"A man's body found along the Missouri River in downtown Omaha Tuesday morning has been identified as 55-year-old Robert Naeve.

A tugboat operator noticed the body on the Nebraska side of the river south of Riverfront Drive and Dodge Street shortly after 11 a.m. The area is home to a number of transients.

The cause of death is still pending results of the autopsy. Investigators do not think it's suspicious."

Now here’s the thing. I didn’t know this fellow very well. I saw him almost weekly. I know that he spent the entire winter living on the river. And survived that only to leave us just as spring is breaking. I’d like to be able to give funny analogies and stories about Bob, but like I said, I just didn’t know him that well. I tried several times to get to know him a little better, but he was just a more reserved kind of fellow and didn’t talk much. About the only thing I really remember from any of our recent encounters was helping him with a pair of boots this past winter. He was so thankful and appreciated the fact that he could get a new pair of boots without having to do anything in return. No strings. No forms to fill out. No conditions. Just a simple transaction, but to him it must have meant something because he thanked me several times over the next few weeks. And then we received word on Tuesday that a body had been found down by the river. And over the next few days, we learned who it was. It is so saddening and disheartening to hear of these things. Very, very difficult. I find myself scouring the papers and Google to see if there is any word about these types of things. And I usually find very little. These guys are just on the outer edges of our daily lives and yet when they leave us, it is with little or no fanfare. Just a 2 or 3 sentence blurb in the local paper, a mention about the fact that his last known address was probably a shelter or a place where the homeless or transients hang out and then they pretty much disappear from our view. I pray that somehow, someway Bob knew the Lord. In THAT way. I just can’t imagine our friends being so marginalized that not only are they somewhat separated from society, so to speak, but they are also separated from God. That is heartbreaking. I pray that somewhere along the way, Bob accepted Christ in his life. That the light of Christ shined on him and he is now in his eternal resting place.

And finally…our streak is over. Today the forecast was for a 65% chance of rain at noon. It rained off and on all night and pretty much all morning. It rained all the way downtown today. But you know a funny thing happened. We arrived downtown and I halfway expected a small crowd due to the nasty weather we were experiencing. But that was not the case at all. It was probably one of the larger crowds we've had so far this year. As we unloaded the trailer, the rain was spitting. Peopel were hustling to get things set up before the rains came. I asked a friend to pray that the rain would stop. he looked at me funny. I said I meant it and right now! He again looked at me funny. I again told him I meant it! Right now! And finally he complied. And it wasn’t like we didn’t pray all morning for the rain to stop. And all the way downtown! So as we got everything set up, the rain started coming down a bit harder. It never poured. That’s the upside. It did rain. That was the downside. In 2.5 years, it had never rained on us downtown. Today that streak ended. I guess it’s time to start the next streak. So while it did rain, we did not get rained out. That has never happened. I pray that it never will. And today we had a huge crowd in spite of the weather. And an amazing meal. A local girl scout troop provided the entire meal. Homemade Salisbury steak, corn, mashed potatoes and gravy. What an amazing day. What an amazing ministry. What an amazing God we serve! Even in the rain! :)

The light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood it. ~John 1:5

Peace, have a great and blessed week and make a difference.

For he will deliver the needy who cry out, the afflicted who have no one to help. ~Psalm 72:12

…it matters to that one… :)

"I'm a beggar…"

He was there when we showed up today. He was there when we left. Actually left a few minutes before us. Large bag of bread slung over his shoulder. On his way to feed the fishes. In the lagoon that is centered in the park that we frequent every Sunday. Like I said, he was there when we got there. As I pulled the van up to the corner, I could tell he’d already been drinking. You see, he spent the last 10 days in jail. The Douglas County Corrections Center has some goofy policy that they should release people around 3 a.m. on Sunday mornings. 3 a.m.? Are you kidding me? Apparently their computer systems are down for whatever reason on Sunday mornings, so they release these guys at 3 a.m. on Sunday mornings before their system goes down. So what do you think a homeless fellow is going to do at 3 a.m. on a Sunday morning after having been cooped up for 10 days on an open container charge? Pretty easy to figure that one out. So when we saw him at noon today? He was feeling no pain. But Robin and I had a conversation with him a couple hours later and there was most certainly pain. On both sides. For us and him.

We met this fellow, to the best of my recollection, on November 12, 2006. In the Office. That concrete, walled place in the middle of the park where he and several of his buddies plied their trades. In their Office. It was a place that once had lots of activity. Not so much anymore. The city pretty much cleaned it out. Took out the benches that were once there. And the fellows have moved their "workplaces" to other confines. But that was where we first met. That first Sunday that now seems so long ago. And today we met once again in the general vicinity of that spot in the park. As soon as we pulled up, I knew it was going to be a bit of a challenging day. Because as much as I hate to admit it, I have my favorites. And he is one of them. In fact, truth be told, he’s probably one of the nicest guys I’ve ever met. At least when he’s sober. No doubt about it. And as Robin and I talked with him today, we just told him how much he meant to us. And he reciprocated. There was just so much hurt. You could just feel it. You know how people get when they’ve been drinking and the truth starts coming out? Not that falling down, stumbling, food spitting kind of drunkenness. But the kind when a guy is starting to sober up a bit and the real truth begins to emerge. That kind of truth. The kind that we rarely see from our friends. At least from my perspective. But we see it often from this fellow. Now I’ve written about him many times. Many. Because he is just simply one of my favorite people.

As we got ready to leave the park today, we had a pretty decent conversation with him. With our kids poking each other in the van, and all the other peripheral activity happening around us, we talked. And at one point, he was questioning us. Why? Why do you guys care so much? Why? And he was insistent that he could never change. Ever. That’s so hard to hear. Eight years on the streets. And I’d guess that about 7.5 or more of those years have been spent in a fog. Maybe that’s a bit of an exaggeration, but I bet not. I mean, 8 years? On the streets? I don’t know but I’d be worn out. And he is. Said so himself. And I mentioned what amazing things God can do for him. I sometimes feel as though I have to be measured in what I say to some of these guys. Everyone thinks they can save these guys from themselves. It’s so easy to give the pat Christian response to a guy in this situation. ‘God can take care of you and your problems man!" "If you just give it all up to God, he’ll take all your worries away!" But to a guy who has spent 8 years living under bridges, in shelters, wherever, well, that’s a difficult concept to grasp. I mean, it’s true. He can and will take our problems. He took care of that a couple thousand years ago. But it’s so easy sometimes to spout our cute little advice to a guy who has no idea what that really means. Sometimes I’m not sure I know what it really means.

So at one point in our conversation, I simply mentioned what an amazing individual he was in God’s eyes. And he immediately went for his wallet. And buried in his wallet, was a piece of paper, folded over several times. On that piece of paper was familiar handwriting. To me anyway. It was Robin’s handwriting. And it spoke exactly of that. How this fellow was an amazing creation of Christ and how God loved him more than any of us could ever fathom. And when he read it, the tears came. And the emotions flowed. He just doesn’t understand why we care. And he doesn’t have to. But he knows we do. And that is what this is all about. Relationships that now have been formed and even though, in most cases, they are only nurtured on a weekly basis for a couple of hours, well, I have to hope that is better than nothing. We need to do more. That’s for sure. This fellow today is convinced that he can never change. Told me, in his own words, "I’m a beggar." That’s so hard to hear. Especially from this fellow. He says he wants to change, but knows he can’t. Knows it. And inside, I’m just busting to tell him that he CAN change. But he and I both know that he has to want it. And right now? He can’t do it. And through his tears and emotions, I could tell he meant it. He is convinced this is it for him. I’m not so sure.

So he was there when we arrived. And he was there when we left. Heading down to the lagoon to feed the fish. And I pray that he shows up next week. And the week after that and the week after that. I pray that he endures and perseveres. That he somehow, in some way finds hope. He’s not a beggar. I mean, we’re all beggars in a sense. But he has so much more to offer. And somehow I have to be able to convince him of that. He says we can’t change him. He’s right. But maybe we can be agents of change. God’s tools. He once told me I was God’s tool. I pray that God would just empower us to be that to this fellow and all the others. That he would somehow use us in some way to make a difference.

We also boast of our troubles, because we know that trouble produces endurance, endurance brings God's approval, and his approval creates hope. This hope does not disappoint us, for God has poured out his love into our hearts by means of the Holy Spirit, who is God's gift to us. ~Romans 5:3-5

Peace, have a great and blessed week and make a difference.

So then, my dear friends, stand firm and steady. Keep busy always in your work for the Lord, since you know that nothing you do in the Lord's service is ever useless. ~1 Corinthians 15:58

…it matters to that one… :)